Mommymoon

As I sit here in the wee hours of the morning jet lagged and out of sync, I’m reflecting on what may have been some of the most relaxing {consistent} days I’ve had in half a decade.

My husband was summoned to a nearly month long business trip to Southern Australia. Me, feeling left out, couldn’t pass up the opportunity to mooch along. It was a last minute whim, but there I was booking my two week trip across the pond. I know, poor me right?! Hardly.

Lucky for me I have a mom whom quite literally just retired and was able to reroute her own vacation to end in Jacksonville to tend to our two girls for the entirety. To say it worked out nicely is a major understatement. I got lucky. But also, my mom is a Godsend.

4 planes and 31 hours of solo travel, my nearly five months pregnant self made it across the globe to Australia. Somewhere I’ve always longed to visit, figuring it would be years down the road before it was actually feasible, yet here I was. Worlds and far too many time zones away from home. Certainly I never thought it would be in these circumstances, but I happily accompanied, grateful for the opportunity.

It’s stunningly beautiful, the air is comfortable around me. The people are kind and equally hilarious to listen to. Their candor is refreshing and I couldn’t get enough of hearing people ask me where my accent was from. Who me? “Oh, ummm American,” (wishing I had a cooler response.) As they nodded their heads knowingly.

The city is calm and clean, you hardly ever hear a honking horn as traffic makes its way through town. The water is the perfect shade of aqua and the sand is warm to the touch.  The lands are sprawling with vineyards and grapes and the country-like towns outside the city were littered with wild kangaroos. Whom completely tickled me pink. I couldn’t get enough of them pouncing around the hills, munching off the land and playfully boxing just as we’ve heard in stories. They are such fascinating creatures, so docile and sweet. I even spotted wild koalas clinging to the tops of eucalyptus trees sleeping the day away. A total trip nonetheless. Every bit of it.

We had plenty of time to do our touristy travels. We moseyed up the beach highways exploring the quaintness of the beach towns, snuggled roos at the conservation park and swam along side a massive pod of wild dolphins on Kangaroo Island (which you have to say in an Australian accent). We strolled the city streets without a destination in mind, stumbling upon whatever fit our fancy. I just felt lucky to be there, no matter what we did.

The first week was busy, filled with many first, and the must-dos, but it also went by in a blink. Like most vacations do. However, you mix in jet lag and overall pregnancy tiredness, as the week came to an end I was ready for a slow down. The second week rolled in and my husbands work picked up, it allotted me time to rest or do whatever I fancied. You know what I thoroughly enjoyed? Not doing a darn thing. Well not completely nothing, but you get the gist.

What my days consisted of is something I’ve only dreamt of as a mother. In fact, it was so blissful, I’m dubbing it my “Mommymoon.” What’s a Mommymoon you ask? Well, we all know what a honeymoon is, and more recently babymoons have become more popular, so why not create a Mommymoon. Where Moms have a retreat of rest, pampering and the opportunity to relight their internal candle.

How often do you actually go on a vacation and not have anything planned? It’s so rare to fit in real unscheduled down time. Especially when you spent a year saving for this epic trip. There’s no time to waste by sitting around doing much of nothing. Sure, if your vacationing to Hawaii you may have a lazy day on the beach here and there, but I mean truly just rolling out of bed at your leisure and not having a plan in the day. It’s freeing. It’s rejuvenating. It’s a game changer.

I’m a mom of 2 with one on the way whom hardly gets alone time. Showers are spent usually with kids banging on the glass asking if I’m done yet, potty breaks are not something I’d ever call a “break” and leisure mornings? Ya right. We live away from our close friends and family so date nights are infrequent and solo mom time usually consists of a quick trip to the grocery store. Which I’ll gladly accept. But it’s hardly comparable. So when asked what I’d do all day while my husband worked and if id be bored by myself– I responded with “do you know how long it’s been since I’ve had alone time? I’ve dreamt about boredom and having enough free time in a day to even become bored in the first place, especially without guilt.”

Real life, its a 6:30 wake up call by a certain 3 year old, whom clamors in to my bed and proceeds to “lovingly” attack my ears and face for her comfort, until she’s restless. Which is then followed by a prompt “I’m ready to get up now, whine” and we’re up and heading downstairs. My five year old sleepily follows not too far behind (sometimes) politely asking for her milk and breakfast ASAP. It’s a scramble to get lunches packed and myself and them decently clothed and primped as we we’re bustling out the door to school. Afternoons are filled with cleaning the same messes over and over, running errands and then squeezing in a workout once my husband gets home. It’s then already time to prep dinner, bathe the kids and the day is done. Whew! A world I wouldn’t trade for anything. It’s chaos but it’s OUR chaos. I really can’t imagine it any other way. But a real break every now and again wouldn’t be the worst thing either.

This brings me to the Mommymoon. Which consisted of nothing of the sort– no wake up calls at all. Just a natural “I’m ready to wake up now” feeling. Followed by an (uninterrupted) scroll through the web and social media. A morning I’m sure most adults actually dream of. I then would slowly make my way down to the gym for my daily workout. It was followed by a prepared breakfast and fresh squeezed juices of my choice, that I’m still drooling over. After, I’d change into my suit and hit the rooftop pool (it’s summer there) and sit on my butt soaking in the last bit of warmth for awhile. I read an entire book plus a half of another, in 3 days. I’d usually then be ready for a nap (because, why wouldn’t I?) My afternoons were typical of meanderings around town debating which juice bar or coffee shop to swing in to. Then head out to the city where I’d find myself mindlessly shopping the outdoor malls, taking in the bustling world around me.

It’s fascinating to just be silent, it really allows you to a take in the culture and be present. There is so much we miss by being glued to our phones or always having a friend or partner in tow keeping you occupied. It was such a new experience for me to just be alone. Eating alone, shopping alone, it’s really not as lonesome as it sounds, and the awkwardness wears off, because frankly no one cares. Not that I want to make it a habit, but it was a new experience I valued. However, I always found comfort knowing my husband would be joining me for dinner out later that evening, I’m not completely a loner, I swear.

I haven’t felt a recharge like that in YEARS. Really truly. No kids. No agenda. No judgment. Just freedom to be.

Typically our children are in tow when we travel. Luckily, they’ve become quite accustom to flying and long car adventures. It’s not always pretty but as we like to say, they are pretty battle tested. I’m all about traveling with your kids for the most part. If it’s something you love to do, it shouldn’t stop you from doing what you’ve always done, you may just need to be a little more lenient. I thoughtfully considered bringing my girls along, but when my mother had offered to come and stay with them instead, I happily rethought my plans.

I do think it’s really important for them to see the world and experience cultures outside of what they are accustom to. What you learn from travel is not something you can be taught. It must be experienced. It must be felt and seen with your own eyes.

This year we’ve also been lucky to do some solo traveling {near and far} — it’s been quite a different experience for us. Spontaneity is one thing that is a bit harder when traveling with children, so without them you have freedoms you didn’t even know existed. Making plans on the fly and not worried in the slightest on what the timeline is. You don’t have to plan snacks and potty breaks and all the other things that inevitably slow your roll. It’s an adventure either way! And either way I’m always go for adventure.

I’m always going to push travel, it’s invaluable, it connects you with cultures and social skills you can’t read about. It teaches you how to step out of your comfort zone and learn how to navigate the unfamiliar. Whether it be language, foods, driving on the opposite side of the roads, or just learning new social cues. It’s experiences you’ll never regret.

However, this time, I’m pushing a different kind of vacation. A vacation from “adulting” — it doesn’t have to be across the globe or even across the town. You could check in a hotel down the street for all it matters. I do think it needs to be out of your home though. Because inevitably you’ll feel the guilt that you “should be doing something useful” and it just won’t have the same affect. I urge you to get off the grid a bit and remember you can’t pour from an empty cup. Something I’ve learned more than ever in this season of life.

I feel like I got my candles re-lit. I am so on board with creating time in your life to take a weekend (or more, if your lucky enough) to step away. To have no shame in just existing. Resting. Real pampering and loving on yourself. With no guilt. Bring on the Mommymoon!